Champyungan:
We have carefully set up this interview with Daesung. After that shocking accident 4 months ago, not only he immediately suspended all his activities, especially doesnt want any media interviews such things. Like this, he said to us "I believe Champyungan interview is not decided by people wishes, If God agrees to this, then it will happen, if it is not the time, then it will not happen. Do not need to insist too much." A few days later, We received a reply from him "I accept"
Oct 02 2011, after finishing 2 prayers We met Kang Dae Sung
1. We interviewed you last year but a lot has happened from then. How are you recently?
- Basically I spend my time in the church, normally I help out the church or the youth group Hepzibah, and then go to the Commission.
2. Like this putting a lot of time and effort in the church, What do you feel?
- After the accident happened, it was very tiring, I even have such thoughts "If people do not trust me, I dont really know what stupid things that I will do. "after went through the most tiring 3-4days, I wanted to meet with the church elderly - Veteran Pastor. I asked one reverand whether is it alright to visit the elderly, and I got positive reply. After meeting him, I felt at ease and he gave me a lot of good comfort words that made my mind feels really calmed. and then the church becomes my everything, the only thing will let me have peaceful mind.
3. "If I dont recieve the trust from others, I will probably have done stupid things" what does this mean?
- Artists often commit suicide isnt it? I can understand their feeling, because this is the reason that cause artists to commit suicide. Although I dont have any suicidal thoughts, but If I dont get the trust from people, I will drift further to the suicidal paths. So I have to be thankful to the power of prayers. Thank you guys for trusting me, Those comments really hurted my heart. The words that made me tire, once a stranger brought a banner with "Killer" on it and stood in front of the church entrance. People use the term "Killer" to look at me, that is my thought.
4. As long as it is within the church it doesnt matter isnt it?
- Of course, although there are a group of people see this situation (me) cannot be peaceful anymore, but inside the church my heart and mind is calmed, but in the dorm I feel very anxious, I cannot eat anything, but in the church I can. Because there are works need to be done at church, so while working, I will not think negatively.
5. For those people who don't believe "going to church will help you calm your mind" If this does not work, why do I feel calmed?
- We are the followers of the church, we shall be able to undetstand the meaning of it. For me, compare church to home, The church makes me feel more peaceful. I read the same articles about me devoting myself to church, only christian people believe in this, thus giving me a good comment.
6. How about the first 3-4 (after the accident)?
- It was impossible to step out from my room, felt very guilty, the scene always appeared on my mind, alone thinking about negative stuff, and that was what i did for the whole day.
7. So what else did u think?
- Whatever it is it's my fault, so i felt very sorry towards him (the victim) , and i prayed a lot. But when I prayed, I remembered the moment the accident happened so I could not continue to pray. This was just at the beginning though, after praying I said "Sorry" and then no longer able to speak more again. Within 20 minutes I kept saying "Sorry" then I began to cry
8. Because of what you felt sorry?
- Firstly, I felt sorry for the victim, then to the company and the members. Also when I thought about it, I felt that our church might be affected by that matter. I did not only expose the church to bad influence, but the church had to suffer from foul gossips. I feel very sorry. I also feel very sorry to my parents and his parents.
9. After this incident did you go to his funeral, that I guess it's not an easy thing to do
- The pace was heavy, but I thought I needed to go. No matter what, this matter involved me, I beared a very deep feeling of sorrow, so I thought I really need to go, but it was very hard to step on his funeral hall, and had to meet face to face with his family members. But then suddenly his family members comforted me.
10. So what did they say?
- They should feel very angry that time (the victim's family members), but after talking to one another they said "the thing has become what it is right now, in the future we need to cherish and live our life more seriously, I wish the reason for us to meet again is because of wonderful things" His aunty told me that because his parents were really sick" Daesung on meeting the family members when he went to pay his respect
11. Whenever people meet with such incidents, we tend to think “Why does this have to do with me?”
-At that point I was really depressed and hence couldn’t find an answer to this question. However as time pass by, at a point whereby the case is close to conclusion, it seems like I have finally recall the time when I review the biblical Mary and Jesus Bible at the church I belong to, once again confirming my belief and hence another chance to make everything right. Since then I’ve come to a conclusion and a mind set of “In fact, it turns out to be giving me time (to think and do the right things)”
12. You were once under the glamorous spotlight, now that you have avoid everyone’s eyes and live silently for months, wouldn’t you feel depressed?
-Of cause I would feel like singing again. However at this point of time I still don’t have the confidence to stand on stage like I used to be, with a cheerful smile on my face for schedules. Showing that kind of Daesung to others like there is no depression. I think that church is still the best. Going to and fro from the apartment to the church is what I’m happy with right now.
13. How do you feel this few days?
-As time pass, my soul is much calmer. Because of my gift (might be referring to his character) as well as the things that I have to settle, I am currently slowly starting to prepare myself.
14. “Things that I have to settle”. Comparing the past and the present, is there any changes in the way you think?
-This period of time has allows me to regain my belief in god and it made me firmly believe in my dreams. I was praised because of my voice and hence I hope to use this gift of singing abilities to gain glory. I would also like to use my ability in imparting missionary strengths to its maximum in life.
15. After the incident you have gotten comfort and support from the senior priest. Ever since then have you guys met one another?
-We see one another very often. Regardless of whatever that is happening, I would approach him to talk over it. After the incident, I would always approach god regarding any plans and schedule before I make a final decision. Actually, the day after the accident I have actually planned to go overseas with my members for a holiday. That is the first holiday for BIGBANG ever since we started promotions. Thinking back, I realise that I have not prayed and discuss the matter with god. No. Not just this trip but for every single thing. That is when I realise that it was because of my wrong doings in the past.
16. You are really incredible. What is the recent thing that has happened that make you feel thankful?
-Thank you. If I have not experience such a thing in my life and work all the way, I might advance a few steps in life and career. However I wouldn’t have clearly understood like how I do now and have a chance to start life all over again. Thinking back in recent events, I have finally gotten rid of all the queries as to why I have come across this event in my head and I am thankful of this chance. On the other hand, it is like an alarm to remind me from time to time to come to my sense.
17. When you feel tired, what did your parents say?
-Not to worry. Learn to manage your emotions first. In the beginning 3 or 4 days, when I lock myself in the dorm, my mom came to visit me. However I rejected all visits and that made my mom really angry. They have accepted the fact and gave me their support. I always feel sorry and thankful towards them for they would only come down hard on me when I don’t perform well or when I’m too stiff.
18. You have recently gotten BIGBANG member Jiyong (G-Dragon) to transfer church and join you. Can you tell us more about that?
-I think this is because of my efforts. Because I have been living my life as usual with church activities, one day Jiyong hyung has express that he would like to come join me at the church through the manager. Hyung originally visit another church but it has been a long time since he last went there, when I ask him when he would head to church, he answer would always be that there is filming. Every time when I hang up the phone, I would be bothered, thinking of ways to let Jiyong hyung come to church and have a relax and natural prayer, hence I have request for Jiyong hyung for extradition. Originally you can’t pray (at the church I went) but in the end upon the church acceptance, he was able to do so.
19. Do you both originally share a close relationship?
-Our members are originally really close to one another, however since Jiyong hyung is the leader of the group, therefore he was able to understand the situation I’m in.
20. But why does it have to be the church you go to?
-You’re right. I have not raise this question before, Maybe it’s because I’m always out at church instead of the dorm and therefore he was curious how church life was. The composer hyungs under YG also goes to the same church as me and that might be one of the factors that influence him. The first time Jiyong hyung came I was reviewing the Mary bible. During that time there were many steel rods in the interior of the church and as we walk to the church, I explained to him that the church is actually going through renovation and he kept telling me it was alright and the moment we got to the doors of the church, he laughed out loud. I didn’t expect this. At that time, the hymn was “I love Jesus”. After that we did our prayers, saying I love god at the same time. During the second prayers, the senior priest was present and I was doing my notes diligently. Jiyong hyung who was by my side said “Ah I can’t really hear him clearly.” This is what every first timer would face, therefore I had to act as an interpreter. After hearing to my explantion, Jiyong hyung felt good. The following week, we visited the senior priest and greeted him. He ask Jiyong hyung how he was felling on his way back last week while Jiyong hyung mention that the moment he and the priest share an eye contact, it felt like the other party knew him well. It was as if the priest has seen through him and it felt great.
21. Are you still constantly praying?
-I pray in the morning when I wake up, when I leave the house, when I take the transport as well as my trip to and fro the church. Before heading to bed and rest for the night I would definitely pray. At the same time I would also do short and simple prayers frequently.
22. There is still 3 months left to the year. What are your plans?
-Firstly, I would not be having any activities for the year and would be taking this time to rest. Of cause I would not let the music class come to waste. For this year I would hope to focus on church. At the same time I have also accepted the events with hepzibah members and people of my age. It feels good as there are many different possibilities in church and I can complete the things that I have promise and ask to do. Hopefully I would be able to give grace to people in all aspects. Recently when I go to church I would always be reminded of 2 3 years ago when I came to church in a mask. Thinking of the situation I was in makes me laugh. Right now my friends in Hepzibah don’t look at me as an artist, instead they treat me like their brother, like a friend.
23. Is there anything you would like to say as we conclude this interview?
-When I heard roughly what I was going to be interviewed this time, it reminds me of the interview last year. Thinking of some of the answers that I’ve gave made me blush. I can’t believe I was once like that. If I have not experience this period, I would still be carrying the same feelings as a year ago to church. I think that is the biggest change (difference in mind set to coming to church) in me and I’m really thankful.
This interview was conducted on 2 October 2011. After the interview, I was curious as to what happened during the last interview that was held last year and hence after some search, I came upon the interview on Champyungan.com and I was shocked. “3 October 2010, the boy who looks more matured then on television head towards the interview venue…”
Although the both of us have not realised it, however the distance between the two interview has been a whole 365 days. In these 365 days, God has watched over him. This overwhelming 36 days, what changes have he made?
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Oct 02 2011, after finishing 2 prayers We met Kang Dae Sung
1. We interviewed you last year but a lot has happened from then. How are you recently?
- Basically I spend my time in the church, normally I help out the church or the youth group Hepzibah, and then go to the Commission.
2. Like this putting a lot of time and effort in the church, What do you feel?
- After the accident happened, it was very tiring, I even have such thoughts "If people do not trust me, I dont really know what stupid things that I will do. "after went through the most tiring 3-4days, I wanted to meet with the church elderly - Veteran Pastor. I asked one reverand whether is it alright to visit the elderly, and I got positive reply. After meeting him, I felt at ease and he gave me a lot of good comfort words that made my mind feels really calmed. and then the church becomes my everything, the only thing will let me have peaceful mind.
3. "If I dont recieve the trust from others, I will probably have done stupid things" what does this mean?
- Artists often commit suicide isnt it? I can understand their feeling, because this is the reason that cause artists to commit suicide. Although I dont have any suicidal thoughts, but If I dont get the trust from people, I will drift further to the suicidal paths. So I have to be thankful to the power of prayers. Thank you guys for trusting me, Those comments really hurted my heart. The words that made me tire, once a stranger brought a banner with "Killer" on it and stood in front of the church entrance. People use the term "Killer" to look at me, that is my thought.
4. As long as it is within the church it doesnt matter isnt it?
- Of course, although there are a group of people see this situation (me) cannot be peaceful anymore, but inside the church my heart and mind is calmed, but in the dorm I feel very anxious, I cannot eat anything, but in the church I can. Because there are works need to be done at church, so while working, I will not think negatively.
5. For those people who don't believe "going to church will help you calm your mind" If this does not work, why do I feel calmed?
- We are the followers of the church, we shall be able to undetstand the meaning of it. For me, compare church to home, The church makes me feel more peaceful. I read the same articles about me devoting myself to church, only christian people believe in this, thus giving me a good comment.
6. How about the first 3-4 (after the accident)?
- It was impossible to step out from my room, felt very guilty, the scene always appeared on my mind, alone thinking about negative stuff, and that was what i did for the whole day.
7. So what else did u think?
- Whatever it is it's my fault, so i felt very sorry towards him (the victim) , and i prayed a lot. But when I prayed, I remembered the moment the accident happened so I could not continue to pray. This was just at the beginning though, after praying I said "Sorry" and then no longer able to speak more again. Within 20 minutes I kept saying "Sorry" then I began to cry
8. Because of what you felt sorry?
- Firstly, I felt sorry for the victim, then to the company and the members. Also when I thought about it, I felt that our church might be affected by that matter. I did not only expose the church to bad influence, but the church had to suffer from foul gossips. I feel very sorry. I also feel very sorry to my parents and his parents.
9. After this incident did you go to his funeral, that I guess it's not an easy thing to do
- The pace was heavy, but I thought I needed to go. No matter what, this matter involved me, I beared a very deep feeling of sorrow, so I thought I really need to go, but it was very hard to step on his funeral hall, and had to meet face to face with his family members. But then suddenly his family members comforted me.
10. So what did they say?
- They should feel very angry that time (the victim's family members), but after talking to one another they said "the thing has become what it is right now, in the future we need to cherish and live our life more seriously, I wish the reason for us to meet again is because of wonderful things" His aunty told me that because his parents were really sick" Daesung on meeting the family members when he went to pay his respect
11. Whenever people meet with such incidents, we tend to think “Why does this have to do with me?”
-At that point I was really depressed and hence couldn’t find an answer to this question. However as time pass by, at a point whereby the case is close to conclusion, it seems like I have finally recall the time when I review the biblical Mary and Jesus Bible at the church I belong to, once again confirming my belief and hence another chance to make everything right. Since then I’ve come to a conclusion and a mind set of “In fact, it turns out to be giving me time (to think and do the right things)”
12. You were once under the glamorous spotlight, now that you have avoid everyone’s eyes and live silently for months, wouldn’t you feel depressed?
-Of cause I would feel like singing again. However at this point of time I still don’t have the confidence to stand on stage like I used to be, with a cheerful smile on my face for schedules. Showing that kind of Daesung to others like there is no depression. I think that church is still the best. Going to and fro from the apartment to the church is what I’m happy with right now.
13. How do you feel this few days?
-As time pass, my soul is much calmer. Because of my gift (might be referring to his character) as well as the things that I have to settle, I am currently slowly starting to prepare myself.
14. “Things that I have to settle”. Comparing the past and the present, is there any changes in the way you think?
-This period of time has allows me to regain my belief in god and it made me firmly believe in my dreams. I was praised because of my voice and hence I hope to use this gift of singing abilities to gain glory. I would also like to use my ability in imparting missionary strengths to its maximum in life.
15. After the incident you have gotten comfort and support from the senior priest. Ever since then have you guys met one another?
-We see one another very often. Regardless of whatever that is happening, I would approach him to talk over it. After the incident, I would always approach god regarding any plans and schedule before I make a final decision. Actually, the day after the accident I have actually planned to go overseas with my members for a holiday. That is the first holiday for BIGBANG ever since we started promotions. Thinking back, I realise that I have not prayed and discuss the matter with god. No. Not just this trip but for every single thing. That is when I realise that it was because of my wrong doings in the past.
16. You are really incredible. What is the recent thing that has happened that make you feel thankful?
-Thank you. If I have not experience such a thing in my life and work all the way, I might advance a few steps in life and career. However I wouldn’t have clearly understood like how I do now and have a chance to start life all over again. Thinking back in recent events, I have finally gotten rid of all the queries as to why I have come across this event in my head and I am thankful of this chance. On the other hand, it is like an alarm to remind me from time to time to come to my sense.
17. When you feel tired, what did your parents say?
-Not to worry. Learn to manage your emotions first. In the beginning 3 or 4 days, when I lock myself in the dorm, my mom came to visit me. However I rejected all visits and that made my mom really angry. They have accepted the fact and gave me their support. I always feel sorry and thankful towards them for they would only come down hard on me when I don’t perform well or when I’m too stiff.
18. You have recently gotten BIGBANG member Jiyong (G-Dragon) to transfer church and join you. Can you tell us more about that?
-I think this is because of my efforts. Because I have been living my life as usual with church activities, one day Jiyong hyung has express that he would like to come join me at the church through the manager. Hyung originally visit another church but it has been a long time since he last went there, when I ask him when he would head to church, he answer would always be that there is filming. Every time when I hang up the phone, I would be bothered, thinking of ways to let Jiyong hyung come to church and have a relax and natural prayer, hence I have request for Jiyong hyung for extradition. Originally you can’t pray (at the church I went) but in the end upon the church acceptance, he was able to do so.
19. Do you both originally share a close relationship?
-Our members are originally really close to one another, however since Jiyong hyung is the leader of the group, therefore he was able to understand the situation I’m in.
20. But why does it have to be the church you go to?
-You’re right. I have not raise this question before, Maybe it’s because I’m always out at church instead of the dorm and therefore he was curious how church life was. The composer hyungs under YG also goes to the same church as me and that might be one of the factors that influence him. The first time Jiyong hyung came I was reviewing the Mary bible. During that time there were many steel rods in the interior of the church and as we walk to the church, I explained to him that the church is actually going through renovation and he kept telling me it was alright and the moment we got to the doors of the church, he laughed out loud. I didn’t expect this. At that time, the hymn was “I love Jesus”. After that we did our prayers, saying I love god at the same time. During the second prayers, the senior priest was present and I was doing my notes diligently. Jiyong hyung who was by my side said “Ah I can’t really hear him clearly.” This is what every first timer would face, therefore I had to act as an interpreter. After hearing to my explantion, Jiyong hyung felt good. The following week, we visited the senior priest and greeted him. He ask Jiyong hyung how he was felling on his way back last week while Jiyong hyung mention that the moment he and the priest share an eye contact, it felt like the other party knew him well. It was as if the priest has seen through him and it felt great.
21. Are you still constantly praying?
-I pray in the morning when I wake up, when I leave the house, when I take the transport as well as my trip to and fro the church. Before heading to bed and rest for the night I would definitely pray. At the same time I would also do short and simple prayers frequently.
22. There is still 3 months left to the year. What are your plans?
-Firstly, I would not be having any activities for the year and would be taking this time to rest. Of cause I would not let the music class come to waste. For this year I would hope to focus on church. At the same time I have also accepted the events with hepzibah members and people of my age. It feels good as there are many different possibilities in church and I can complete the things that I have promise and ask to do. Hopefully I would be able to give grace to people in all aspects. Recently when I go to church I would always be reminded of 2 3 years ago when I came to church in a mask. Thinking of the situation I was in makes me laugh. Right now my friends in Hepzibah don’t look at me as an artist, instead they treat me like their brother, like a friend.
23. Is there anything you would like to say as we conclude this interview?
-When I heard roughly what I was going to be interviewed this time, it reminds me of the interview last year. Thinking of some of the answers that I’ve gave made me blush. I can’t believe I was once like that. If I have not experience this period, I would still be carrying the same feelings as a year ago to church. I think that is the biggest change (difference in mind set to coming to church) in me and I’m really thankful.
This interview was conducted on 2 October 2011. After the interview, I was curious as to what happened during the last interview that was held last year and hence after some search, I came upon the interview on Champyungan.com and I was shocked. “3 October 2010, the boy who looks more matured then on television head towards the interview venue…”
Although the both of us have not realised it, however the distance between the two interview has been a whole 365 days. In these 365 days, God has watched over him. This overwhelming 36 days, what changes have he made?
Long Interview, but really fun to read, so enjoy!^^
Source : Champyungan//Translation : 咚咚噗, rnosel@twitter, Eliza
Shared by Eliza@BIGBANGWORLD
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